To some, porn is a sexy form of entertainment, and there are many different categories depending on what you like or what your kinks are.
Porn is a way for many to get in the mood, and even though porn can help spark a flame, it can also be damaging to the perspective we have on sex and relationships. Porn is staged, and many of the things we see cannot be further from the truth. It's important to remind this to ourselves, so we don't lose touch with reality.
Porn and Reality: Not everything is as it seems
Foreplay:
Foreplay is one of the most critical phases of your sexual experience, and as porn is mainly built for male consumption, most of it shows very little to none foreplay at all. This might be okay for people with penises who might get aroused more quickly, but if you have a vulva, foreplay should last at least two minutes to get in the mood successfully and give your vagina time to start the lubrication process, so you can assure a great time
The Orgasm:
In porn, everybody always seems to orgasm. Unfortunately, there seems to be an orgasm gap between penises and vaginas in the heterosexual world. As we discussed in our post about squirting, some porn stars drink excessive amounts of water before filming, and others even fill in their vaginas with water to mimic the act of squirting.
Apart from this, many heterosexual women feel pressured to sound like porn actresses. You know, the good old fake obnoxious screams. And talking about faking, part of the reason why the orgasm gap prevails is that many women feel pressured to fake orgasms, some to keep men happy and some to feel less ashamed for not "being able" to get there.
Please remember that if you're having sex with someone, it's not only your job to get to the climax; your partner is part of your sexual journey as well and should contribute to your pleasure.
Our advice: Talk to your partner about how you feel! Excellent communication leads to great relationships. Make sure you feel comfortable with your sexual exploration. Sexuality should not be embarrassing; it's something beautiful we should all embrace.
Body Standards:
Most porn stars have perfectly built bodies, but we're here to break the illusion. First things first, they get paid to look like that, secondly, some women in the porn industry go through surgery to look that way, and we're not only talking about breast augmentation. Pornstars sometimes get labiaplasty to change the way their vulva looks, and some go as far as performing anal bleaching.
Not only pornstar with big penises are the most hired, but there are tricks to make this sex organ look bigger on set. In reality, sex is not only about penetration. Size matters to some and doesn't matter to others because we're all built differently, and we all have different erogenous zones.
Last but not least, it seems like almost every penis and vulva in conventional porn is hairless, but guess what? We all grow pubic hair!! 😱
Wear Protection!
When was the last time you saw someone putting on a condom in a porn film?. Exactly! in most porn, you won't see people wearing protection. As we have established, porn is staged, a fantasy. I'm sure you don't want to go through any STDs or unwanted pregnancy, so please, 👏 always 👏 protect 👏 yourself.
How to explore new possibilities:
Not all of it is bad; porn can be an eye-opener to what you like and what you might want to experiment with. If you realize you're into kinks and fantasies and would like to explore them in bed, remember to keep these safety tips in mind:
Make sure it is consensual and that everybody is on board with the idea.
Make sure you trust your partner and/or the people you will experiment with. It is essential to build a safe space.
Choose a safe word that will mean "No" or "Please let's stop," which will set an automatic boundary. For example, some people use "green" to let their partner know they like what is happening or allow their partners to do something to them, "yellow" as a warning, and "red" to stop completely.
You may be susceptible to what you see on TV or the internet without knowing it. Whenever you feel ashamed o embarrassed about your body, try to find the root of it and remember that we're all human; imperfections make us perfect. So don't worry too much about what you see in porn, and enjoy your desires.
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